You're Engaged! Now What? - Planning Your Perfect Oklahoma Wedding

Congratulations on your engagement! The excitement of saying "yes" is unforgettable, but as the initial euphoria settles, you may wonder: what's next? Here are the first 14 steps to ensure your wedding planning journey starts smoothly and stress-free.

1. Celebrate the Moment!

   Before diving into logistics, take a moment to celebrate your engagement. Whether it’s an intimate dinner or a party with family and friends, this is your time to revel in the joy. Planning will start soon enough. Enjoy the moment.

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2. Announce Your Engagement

Share the big news! Whether you choose social media, a group text, or personalized announcements, spreading the word is a joyful step. Many couples use social media. They post pics of the proposal, have engagement photos taken, or just candid photos. Before social media, couples would announce their engagement in their local newspaper. Some still do in the Lifestyles or Features section of their hometown newspapers.

3. Get Your Ring Insured

Your engagement ring is precious. Contact your insurance provider to add it to your policy or explore specialized jewelry insurance. If you use your homeowner’s or renter’s insurance set it out specifically with price, pictures, and receipt or appraisal.

4. Set a Preliminary Budget

Before booking anything, decide on a realistic budget. Determine who will be contributing and allocate funds accordingly. Talk with your parents if you expect them to contribute. Many couples opt to pay for their own weddings. If others are contributing to your budget, write down the amount and exactly what they are covering. That way you know what expectations are.

5. Draft a Guest List

Start by drafting a preliminary guest list to help shape your venue options and budget planning. Be selective with your invitations — you’re not obligated to include everyone you know or all your parents' acquaintances. If you haven’t spoken to someone in the past six months, it’s reasonable to leave them off the list. Likewise, if you’re not in touch with certain relatives and haven’t communicated with them in a year, it’s perfectly acceptable to exclude them as well.

6. Pick a Preferred Date or Season

Choosing a timeframe (spring, summer, etc.) or specific date will shape venue and vendor availability. Some venues have a “wedding season”. If you want a March or April wedding, you will be competing with proms for your DJ and possibly your venue, so you will want to book them early.  Other vendors have busy seasons, as well.

7. Discuss Your Wedding Vision

Sit down with your partner and discuss what you both envision for the big day—formal or casual, destination or local, grand or intimate. Be honest about what you want. Decide on colors and start a Pinterest board or Planning board with inspiration photos. This will help you stay on theme. Tweak your board as you refine your vision.

8. Research and Book Your Venue

Venues can book up quickly, so start researching options that align with your budget and vision. Touring spaces early can help you secure your dream location. Venues in metro areas book 12-24 months out. More rural venues may have availability 6-12 months out. Some venues only book on Saturdays, some only on weekends, and some 365 days/year. Having a date or season in mind will help determine if your venue will be available. Ask questions. Have your list with you. Write down the answers. You will have all the information in front of you when you compare venues. (Look for a future article on questions to ask your venue before you book!)

9. Hire a Wedding Planner (If Desired)

If you prefer a guided, stress-free process, consider hiring a planner to manage the details and offer expert advice. Check prices and compare reviews. If a planner is out of your budget, look at a day-of-event coordinator or month-of-event coordinator.  They don’t hire your vendors, but they are on site to help with vendors and will help keep things running smoothly on your wedding day.

10. Choose Your Wedding Party

Decide who you’d like standing beside you on your big day and ask them early so they can save the date. Let them know what the budget will be for attire. Some couples purchase or rent their attendant’s wedding outfits. For some the expectation is the attendants will purchase their own dress/suit. Many split the difference. If dresses are to be worn, the couple purchases the dresses and the attendants purchase their own shoes, jewelry, etc.  If suits are rented, the couple will pay part of the rental or they will ask their attendants to wear a nice, pressed pair of jeans with a rented suit jacket and vest. There are options, but you want to be on the same page with expenses. The wedding is expensive for the couple but can also be expensive for the wedding party. Also, talk with your honor attendants about expectations. Let them know what you would like them to help with: go with you to your dress or suit fittings, cake testing, florist visits, attend bridal showers. If they are not local those trips may add to their expenses. Talking with them early on will help them budget and prepare. They will also have those dates on their calendar and won’t be surprised.

11. Create a Wedding Website

A personalized website helps keep guests informed about key details like the date, venue, and hotel accommodations. Many venues now have a client portal that includes a website for you to create with your story, photos, rsvp link, etc. Ask your venue!

12. Start Researching Vendors

Photographers, florists, music, and caterers are often booked months in advance. Begin researching and reaching out early. Ask about availability for your date, contract, price and payment options. Book your preferred venue first. If your venue isn't available for your date, you may decide to change your date. You may be penalized by other vendors when date changes are made.

13. Schedule an Engagement Photo Shoot

Engagement photos are a wonderful keepsake and can be used for your save-the-date cards, wedding website, or announcements. Your wedding photographer may include an engagement session as part of their wedding package. You may be able to use your venue grounds for your engagement photos if you have already booked them.

14. Stay Organized

Whether you use a dedicated binder, app, or spreadsheet, keeping track of timelines, budgets, and vendor details is essential for stress-free planning. List everything. Share with your partner. This will help you both stay on budget. It will also help ensure you don’t forget anything. Supplement with ideas you find online and on social media. Check your list weekly to make sure you stay on top of anything with a deadline. Don't forget to include your guest list. You will want to mark RSVPs as they are received.

Final Thoughts

Your engagement is a magical time, so while planning is important, don’t forget to cherish the journey. Take breaks when needed, lean on your support system, and most importantly, enjoy every moment leading up to your big day!

Congratulations!!